Quotes

"I’m not a good girl, but also I am not a bad girl.  I don’t know I am a what girl." -’Jessica’

"A book talk about a nice story where under the telephone." -’Wacky’

"Teacher tests the book, but when he watch it, he finds it is over there." -’James’

"I’ll walk out the native door." -’Frank’

"The little boy as cry.  I think he is want to eat, so I giving him a banana.  He throw to me.  Say: Don’t give me, go out! The little boy unlike, I don’t love him." -’Stella’

"At the way, we laughed and had joy at something about our [class] monitor.  Our monitor is a good man, he has a beautiful face and always help the other people.  We love he, like our brother.  After a hou, we reached at the NenJiang.  People, who are swimming, are very large.  Eevery place was filled with happy air." -’Stone’

"[I] decided to go swimming with my boyfriend.  But he is a feudalistic man.  He told me that is a dangerous thing.  I don’t know what happened in the swimming pool.  He said: ’there must be a lot of bad men, and they will watch my body.  Because I only wear a swimsuit.’ Oh, dear! I’m very angry.  I don’t understand him.  It’s horrorable." -’Angel’

’Annie’ predicts that in her children’s lifetime, one woman can have two husbands, and calls it a good thing!  She also predicts that her mother will change her head shape next week, and women will turn into monarchs in China within her lifetime!

Posted by *amanda* on 6 replies

Comments:

01. Sep 29, 2003 at 09:39am by Patrick Copland:

Where are these quotes from?  Sounds like 4th grade kids with a list of vocabulary words from 8th grade.

02. Sep 30, 2003 at 03:32am by *amanda*:

They were my students in the spring and summer, finishing their first year of college.  I’m not really mocking their English, after all, they’re trying; but I just think the quotes were particularly funny.  Sorry if they are only amusing to me!

Anthony, your spell-checker didn’t like the way I spelled English.  What’s going on here?

03. Sep 30, 2003 at 06:38am by Anthony:

That’s because you spelled it wrong.  There’s no "g" in English.

....ok, seriously, the dictionary used by the spellchecker doesn’t have any proper nouns in it, so it flags proper nouns as misspellings.  It says something to that effect on the top of the spelling-errors page when you post.

PS, this is the best:
"He throw to me.  Say: Don’t give me, go out! The little boy unlike, I don’t love him."

04. Sep 30, 2003 at 11:17am by *amanda*:

>That’s because you spelled it wrong.  There’s no "g" in English.

sheesh
When I saw that, I hadn’t scrolled down far enough to read the "seriously" part, and my heart about stopped!  You know, as a teacher who wasn’t meant to be a teacher, and doesn’t want to be a teacher, I have an inferiority complex (I turned the spell checker off, I don’t want to know if I got that one right).  I have a secret fear of spelling things wrong on the blackboard.  Also, every day as I climb the stairs, I predict to myself that one day I’ll have a spectacular fall.

I have a new "web-letter" up, you may read it if you like, e-mail me if you don’t remember the URL!  I hope your day is "filled with happy air!"

05. Sep 30, 2003 at 05:21pm by Anthony:

> I hadn’t scrolled down far enough to read the "seriously"
> part, and my heart about stopped!

Teehehe  : )

I know what you mean though... I don’t think I have an inferiority complex over it, but I feel so dumb when I misspell something.  At least in part because I see so many ppl online hwo talk 2 u like dis and I can’t STAND it, and I feel like I’m somehow akin to those cretins when I make a mistake.

06. Oct 1, 2003 at 01:20am by Patrick Copland:

Actually, I appreciate and respect anyone who tries to learn English as a second language.  It is a difficult language.

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